Years ago, when my youngest daughter was a toddler, she would play hide and seek with her dad when he came home from work. When he would pull into the driveway, I would say “Daddy’s home! Quick, hide so he can’t find you!”.
Her response was always to stay exactly where she was and cover her eyes with her hands. Like most toddlers, she thought if she couldn’t see her dad, then he couldn’t see her, either.
I see a lot of parents, mostly dads, playing a similar game with their child’s Attention Deficit Disorder. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been contacted by a mom who tells me that the school thinks her child has AD/HD. The questions she has are always the same:
- How do I find out if it is AD/HD?
- What should I do?
- Do I have to put them on ADD medication? My husband is already mad that the school thinks our child has AD/HD; there’s no way he’ll let me put him on medication.
Now I understand that the whole subject of AD/HD medication is one that causes a lot of controversy. I know that it’s a scary proposition; I went through the same thing myself with my son years ago.
The decision to put or not put your child on AD/HD medication is one that you as parents must make; it is your right to do so. However, you have a responsibility as parents to make that decision from an informed perspective.
Don’t tell me that you don’t want to get your child tested because you might find out that they have Attention Deficit Disorder, or that you won’t consider medication because your husband won’t allow it. That kind of attitude makes my blood boil, because what this is really about is daddy’s ego, not the child’s best interests.
Pull your head up out of the sand, quit hiding your eyes behind your hands, and see the truth for whatever it is. Nobody wants their child to have Attention Deficit Disorder, and most parents would rather not have to give their children medication to help them manage it. But we face what is head on, because until we do that, we can’t possibly help our children live the lives they were meant to live.